Stewies Playground - Your Family Guy Source

February 11th, 2008

This is why Brian Griffin is not a good babysitter

Stewie Griffin: Hey, Brian, remember me? I’m the guy you left standing at the counter at McDonald’s with a bag full of burgers. You know it’s funny, I tried to walk home and, um, a lot of hungry deer walking around at this hour of the night and, um, oh here’s where the story gets […]

By Wendy -- 3 comments

January 24th, 2008

Who ya gonna call?

Tom Tucker: A bit of breaking news. A local family is forced out of their home by ghosts. Who are they gonna call?
Diane Simmons (sighs): Ghostbusters, Tom.
Tom Tucker: No, Diane. Their insurance company. That’s just stupid what you said.

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January 23rd, 2008

A whole lotta Family Guy quotes goin’ on

Stewie Griffin: Hello, mother. I come bearing a gift. I’ll give you a hint. It’s in my diaper and it’s not a toaster.
Brian Griffin: Whose leg do I have to hump to get a dry martini around here?
Peter Griffin: Lois, when I’m through with them, our kids will be so smart, they’ll be able to […]

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January 19th, 2008

Lois Griffin in real life

Wow, pretty fair likeness I would say!

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By Wendy -- 2 comments

January 16th, 2008

Let’s play “I Never!”

Peter: Hey hey I got an idea. Lets play “I Never.” You got to drink if you did the thing that the person says they never did.
Cleveland: Oh I got one, I never slept with a women with the lights on.
(They all drink.)
Joe: I’ll go next, uh I never had sex with Cleveland’s wife.
(Quagmire and […]

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October 11th, 2007

What George and Laura talk about at night

Chris: What do you do at a Young Republicans meeting?
Alyssa: We help those who already have the means to help themselves. Also, we perpetuate the idea that Jesus chose America to destroy non-believers and brown people.
Chris: I don’t know why, but I feel safer already.
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August 16th, 2007

Stewie Griffin quotes

Stewie: Those jugs are mine until all the milk dries up. Then you can have the remains!
Brian: I’ll be in the basement.
Peter: Doin’ what?
Brian: What do you think?
(Everyone laughs)
Stewie: Someone will have to explain that to me.
Stewie: Excellent, the mind control device is nearing completion!
Lois: Stewie, no toys at the table. (Takes mind […]

By Wendy -- 1 comment

April 12th, 2007

Family Guy has a cow

PETER: Aw, geeze. This isn’t another one of those interventions, is it? FLASHBACK TO INTERVENTION
(FRIENDS AND FAMILY GATHER AROUND PETER WHO’S WEARING A BIGFOAM COWBOY HAT)
LOIS: Peter, you’ve been wearing that giant foam cowboy hat for eight months now. Please, for your family, take it off.
PETER: Hey, Hey, I can take this hat off […]

By Wendy -- 2 comments

January 1st, 2007

Everyone who wants to fight in Iraq is gay

PETER: That’s why they picked me to convince Congress to go to war.
INT. CONGRESS - DAY (FLASHBACK) Peter stands in the front of the room talking to a room full of CONGRESSMEN.
CONGRESSMANThere is no just cause for an invasion of Iraq.PETERWell, that may be. But what we’re all forgetting is, anyone who doesn’t wanna to […]

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October 11th, 2006

Stewie giving Meg some (unwanted) advice

Stewie: Did you hear that Meg? Guys can marry other guys now. So…this is awkward, but I mean, if they can do that, that is pretty much it for you, isn’t it? I mean you as well pack it in. Game over.
Meg (about Peter being retarded): I can never go to school again!Stewie: Oh, yes, […]

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